Week in PREview

So, the week ahead looks to be a boring one. Even though I have Kaili home for spring break, and John has the week off, I still anticipate boredom.  This, unfortunately is not a new concept for me.

Let me explain a little more. I am scheduled for surgery Monday the 14th. It's hernia repair surgery.

 I have 2.

 In the abdomen.

They are a result of the major surgery I had back in April.

Once I have the surgery I am on a lift restriction for the first week...no lifting at all. AFter that, no lifting anything more than 20lbs for 5 more weeks.

Man, that's going to be interesting. When  you are put on lift restrictions, you suddenly realize how much you DO lift over the course of a day.

laundry

dishes

kids

pull on dogs leashes

groceries

a gallon of milk

more laundry

blankets

poop scooping bucket

mail

hahaha, i wish the mail was big and heavy all the time, that means packages

chairs

containers of flour, sugar, etc...

shovels

weights

lizards

ok...I have been admonished...the lizard doesn't weigh too much! That's ok.

babies

vacuuming (no problem)

books

scriptures

I plan to restrict myself to even less than the 20 my doc is recommending because I do NOT want these to come back.

They have been very uncomfortable.

I am ready to have them fixed.

I am ready to not lift the dishes! lol

So, all this non-lifting will lead to a boring week this week.

Unless Kaili will play non-stop Fasttrack with me. 24/7. Hmm, can one play Fasttrack for that long and still enjoy it.? Dad??? Answer please.....

Kk, dinner is ready, and everyone else is already eating. How many things do you lift in a day?

Maybe I will be able to lift my fingers to type so I can blog every day next week.

Yes, I'll milk this, why shouldn't I?

hahaha yeah!

Blessings to all of you

Dani

Coming home

Kaili comes home tonight for spring break week. My littleman can hardly contain himself. He is wide awake, running around, keeps looking out the window, and is completely wound up!
Wound up to the point of needing to possibly be put in his room which would ruin his whole evening.
I would hate to do it, but I would. At present he is in time out.
I am such a MEAN mom I know. Like who does time out anymore?

What?

Seriously?

People still use time out? And it works? For who? I wanna know....

What about spanking? Do people still spank their kids? I don't mean hit, abuse, demean, or otherwise shame their offspring, but really, spank! Not out of anger but for sheer discipline purposes. I do spank Damon sometimes however, I just realized the other day that I haven't done it in a while. I have been using time outs, and possible time in his room. Or if there is a toy that is extra special to him on a given day, I will use that as something I can take away.

TMI ( as in too much information) you might be thinking as you read this. But I am just keepin it real.

REal like,
Sometimes I wish I didn't have pets.
Sometimes I wish I lived far away (like Australia...duh)
Sometimes I wish I Could just lie on the beach forever.
Sometimes I wish Damon was still a baby...heck, I sometimes wish  Kaili was still a baby.....haha, not really though.
Sometimes I wish I could go back 4 years and wave a magic wand.
Sometimes I wish I could just wake up one morning and be skinny and fit.
Sometimes I wish I didn't hate running so much...Really some people make it look SO easy. It stinks.
Sometimes I wish Damon had a sibling close to his own age.
Sometimes I wish I didn't feel so alone even when surrounded by people.
Sometimes I wish upon a star!!!!
All the time I wish no one had to suffer....loss, pain, illness, sadness, natural disaster, etc...
I wish you all the Blessings you deserve
Love,
Dani

Presious Moments

These are just a few of my precious moments! I have so many I could sit here for days and load pictures and write....and still not be done.

Having fun with webcam 2008

Making faces 2008



smooches all around. 2008

I am so lucky, no blessed, to have so many precious moments, precious memories. It is my prayer that my children will share some of those and view them as such when they get older. My son had a talk with me one day and informed me that, "mom, Jesus gave you the right boy......" To which I replied, "yes he DID! And I think you got the right mom!!!" Damon, "I did, you are the right mom. So Jesus gave me the right mom, and he gave  you the right boy!"
Excellent observation my boy!!!! I am in total agreeance.

Then in a conversation last week. Damon to me, "Mom, you are gonna die, I will miss you when you go to heaven. " I replied, "I will miss you too!" Damon said, "Mom when you die you will get to go to lots of different worlds!" I stated, " Well I am excited about that, but I am more excited to be here with you and Daddy for now." "Mom, when you die I will miss you, and Daddy and I will be sad, we will cry all day, and when we go to bed, and when we wake up we will still be crying."

And it went on for a few more comments, but where do kids get this stuff? I don't remember being so direct with him about my illness so where he gets these ideas is beyond me. I PRAY he isn't some future Prophet because he seems to think this is going to happen this summer. hmmmnmn, I wholeheartedly disagree.
At least it won't be from being sick.

Let me tell you something though...from deep inside. Don't let my smile fool you! I am still SCARED. I know I am clean right now, but how long will it last? How long will I be blessed to raise my wonderful son?

Like I heard someone say yesterday, "I don't have control over how long I live, but I have control over how I live." Pregnant mom fighitng cancer.

Life is SO Precious and yet it is easy to get caught up in our fears, our desires, our jobs, our thoughts.

I feel so compassionate towards one of my best friends, Anna. I pray for her often. She has two family members now dealing with stage IV cancer, and a few friends fighting also, including me. It's all around her.

Here's a scripture I love...
     James 1:5
         "If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given to him."
     or similarly in the Book of Mormon,
    2 Nephi4:35
        "Yea, I know that God will give liberally to him that asketh. Yea, My God will give me, if I ask not amiss: therefore I will lift up my voice unto thee,: yea I will cry unto thee, my God, the rock of my righteousness. Behold my voice shall forever ascend up unto thee, my rock and mine everlasting God. Amen."

So, Ask and ye shall recieve!!!!!
 Ask with Faith in  your heart, believing always!

Just don't be fooled. I DO have faith and believe that I will be healthy for awhile, however I am still Scared. Will it be long enough? Maybe this isn't about me at all, maybe it's about the people who love me. Maybe there is something for them to learn. Whatever it is, I pray my Heavenly Father will provide a way, and I know he will, for all of us to get through!
Peace, blessings, and love to each of you!!!!
Dani

Flashback

A friend of mine, One of the ladies who's blog I follow and she follows mine, posted some past pic's of her son's wedding reception. It made me think back to a time in my own life that I enjoyed so very much and feel like sharing a few pic's of my own.

It was Hawaii. More specifically, Kauai, HI. We went there in  2008 and it was so much fun. The sun was wonderful, the beaches Great, and the skies, mostly blue.

 



One Amazing View!!!





Grand Canyon of the Pacific....magnificant.





Guess we wore him out! Siesta time for Littleman.





How much more relaxing can it get ?? A massage at poolside in the sunshine...?


It was GREAT going there with my family and my best friend Anna and her two girls. We really enjoyed each others company and the sun. We also enjoyed something else we really could have done without. Of course now I see that I have no pictures of this thing we enjoyed but I will tell you. We discovered a Coldstone Creamery across the road from our resort and not so reluctantly at all, we partook of this yummy ice cream every night we were there. We would put the kids to bed, and one of us would make a Creamery run! Then we sat at a table on the grounds in the middle of the units where we could see each of our units and play phase 10 dice while eating our ice cream. I enjoyed it until we got home and I saw how much weight I gained on that trip. lol
I would do it all over again except I would eat more pineapple than ice cream. maybe. I like to think I would. It's a good thing I am not returning this year. Maybe by the time we do return I will have a firm grasp of my new eating lifestyle and won't have any need (yes I said need) or desire for the creamy yumminess of Cold Stone Creamery. We'll see.
In the meantime I will drool over my pictures of the best vacation ever, and continue to immerse myself in my new lifestyle of eating as many whole foods as possible.

Over the course of several days, we have been busy. Playing...climbing...

Swimming...

Floating...

Doing Dishes...or not!

And ending it all with a delicious homemade soup made in the Vitamix. Tortilla Soup. A great way for me to get my veggies. Oh so good. Not to mention a nice way to warm up after being out in the ChiLLy wind.

I like days like these. Damon gets to burn off energy, have fun, and I get to eat healthy! Damon had his last swimming lesson at current level today. He starts his next level on 23 March. He is already looking forward to them.

As for me, I am already looking forward to my next meal made in my new Vitamix!!! lovin it.

confessions

My guys. I look at those faces and can't believe what I did today! I feel terrible.

I cheated. I cheated. And when john finds out he is going to be SO disappointed in me. As he should be. But

before I tell him I have to confess something else....


I enjoyed every second of it. And I mean enjoyed!!! It was so good. And once I got a  taste of it, I only

wanted more. I wanted it to last and last.

I have another confession.....

Damon was with me. I cheated right in front of my son!!! I feel so bad. I'm such a bad mom. A bad wife.

I didn't even cheat with a tall, dark, handsome, muscular guy half my age...no....

I'll tell you the facts.

I was walking through the Dimond mall with Damon, when we came around a corner and there it was.

The smell was soooo overwhelmingly delicious.

I walked by looking longing at the object of my lust. I proceeded to the comic book store with Damon all the while doing the self talk.
don't do it Dani, you'll be sorry. You will disappoint John and feel guilty for hours or even days to come.

Damon and I returned down the hall of the mall, and coming around a corner there it was again!!!!!

Ok, I decided to just give in to my desires. My opening line?

Maybe I please have a pretzel dog??? with cheese? And cinnamon nuggets for my son?

It was fresh out of the oven and HOT. Oh so HOT. I took it with me to the truck, got Damon situated and started my "dog". Oh that first bite was sooo delicious.

I enjoyed every single bite of that pretzel dog. From Auntie Annes. Interestingly enough my friend Anna introduced me to them when we went to Vegas last April.
Mmmmmm mmmm good. I have been drooling for one for months. I basically gave up meat and dairy months ago and Hot dogs before that. So it was a big breakdown for me to do this.

I did enjoy every bit of that dog, but I also feel terrible now. Mentally, emotionally. I came home and made soup in my Vitamix with all sorts of veggies. Maybe by tomorrow I will feel better.

 In other news, the day before my devastating choice was good. I was going to post pics, but the blog isn't let me add more now for some reason. will post tomorrow.

I hope none of you have to go through the feelings I did today. Don't make a choice like I did. You can exhibit better self control, as I am going to work on tomorrow.

love to all of you!!!
Dani