Who has heard that country song...'Hard 2 Love", by Lee Brice? It's great. It made me think of Chemo though. lol
It's hard 2 love hard 2 love the side effects, but I might like that its' good for me in ONE way. To shrink the lesions on my lungs.
In the mean time, It's hard to love cotton mouth, Hard to love cold sensitivity, Hard to love fatigue, Hard to love carrying around a fanny pack of med's for 46 hours after infusion. Hard to love not being able to drink or eat cold things. Hard to love nausea.
But it's easy to love the hope that it is helping me in the long run. though a person can only take so much of this particular medicine in a lifetime, so eventually there will have to be something else that works for me, or doesn't. Preferably works!!!
I am going to stay as strong as I can, physically in order to keep up with the regimen, and emotionally to keep up with my family, or help keep them up!
28 August, 2012
Saturday, August 18, 2012
Well, it’s been an amazing two weeks! We came down to Austin, Texas to vacation in New Braunfels at the Worldmark resort there. My older brother, Dan, and his family came down to spend a few days with us. During that first few days, my younger brother, Jeremy, and his family (bigger by two all of a sudden) drove to New Braunfels while we were there and spent time with us. It was great to all be together and catch up with the spouses, and all the nieces and nephews. Until now there were only two nieces, Kaili and Jana, now there are three. Kaili, Jana, and Lucy now known to us as Sophie. As for the nephews, there was Alex, Jeffrey, Tyler, Damon and now add to that mix, Justin, now known as Ryder. Unfortunately Kaili was unable to be with us. We got lots of great pictures, and had fun together. We went to Schlitterbahn, swimming at the resort, out to dinner, toured Historic Gruene, Texas, and one night went to Gruene Hall to listen to the music. We went to San Antonio to see the Alamo and do the River Walk….which turned out to be a very hot thing to do that day.
I am in love with Gruene, Texas and Gruene Hall! I could go there several times a week and just listen to the music and practice my two step.
I am sad for our time here to end. It means saying goodbye to family, goodbye to the sun. It means getting back to reality, the reality that is mine almost constantly these days. I have to return to Chemo. Round 3. I am not looking forward to it. I have to go back on the medication that causes neuropathy. I don’t think the outcome could be good as I still have neuropathy from round 1 which ended almost 2 yrs ago. When I say that though I think I should just shut up and count my blessings that I have a “2 yrs ago” to even talk about. Amen to that. There is a new medicine coming out , hopefully to be approved by the FDA by November. I will be in line to try that one out. Of course it comes with it’s own share of side effects, but some are more tolerable than others.
For now I am savoring the time I just spent in Texas! We spent the last two days at Jeremy and Kristin’s home. It was amazing to see family, the sun, relax, and renew bonds.
01 August, 2012
Well, it's been tiring but good to be here for a quick visit and medical appointments. My brother, Jeremy and I drove to Houston twice this week to see the doctor at MD Anderson. The rest of the time I am just relaxing and enjoying with my nephew, brother and sister-in-law, Kristin. It's been real hot here...but that is okay. I realize the heat gets real old to those living here and I am sure it would to me too if i lived here, but I just came to thaw out a bit.
I am definitely thawing...fast.
Right now my Texas boyfriend is laying across my arm and I am having trouble typing, but he is such a cuddler and love.
I leave tomorrow night and return Sunday for a 2 week vacation. We will be in New Bruenfels. I am looking forward to it for numerous reasons, a few of which are that my older brother and his family are coming down from Iowa to share some time with us at the Worldmark resort, and so all three of us and our families will be together for a few days. We plan to hit Schlitterban, the world famous water park, as well as SeaWorld and whatever else we feel inclined to do. There will also be some relaxing and visiting going on. Just what I need!!! And John also!!! Maybe he more than me. I will be returning to treatment when we return to Alaska and he does so much for me anyway, but even more when I am going through Chemo. He needs a chance to warm up and feel the sun on his face and shoulders.