I'm sitting here staring at my computer, trying to decide what to write about. I have so much going on in my head and heart.
Since the CT scan and results I have been more disheartened. I am still having good days, laughing, having fun, doing what needs to be done.
I couldn't even focus on yesterdays post....I left it and here I am again today, thursday, still with no interesting post ideas.
John spent a lot of time yesterday working on our garden...thank goodness it's almost done.. I just have to plant my carrots and some spinach. And of course in the front of the house I want to plant more flowers for lots of color. Today it rained all day so it was too wet to go out with little Ava (the sweet little girl I take care of during the day). lol Not that I wanted to go out and plant in the rain...no not even a little bit.
I finally made carrot/apple juice in the juicer...it was actually yummy. Last time I made some, over a year ago, it gagged me. I must have had the ratio of carrot/apple wrong. haha. Even Damon drank some yesterday and today. So proud of him. I guess if he isn't going to eat salad anymore, I should be happy he is willing to drink carrot juice. Even Ava drank some of mine. She loves it. She loves my vitamix soup, my smoothies, and even green juice.
Damon is feeling much better after having come down with Strep throat and being treated. now John doesn't feel good. I guess with all of us so stressed out it is not surprising we are coming down with viruses.
We are going to learn to reduce our stress, I don't know how, but we will work on that. Juice, scripture reading, doing things together, for me...gardening, reading, crocheting maybe, riding bike when it's not raining.
Well I guess this has just been a random post. the goings on around here day to day. John and I are finally working on our "will". that's not the funnest thing to talk about and deal with but it needs to be done sooner rather than later. I get more upset about dealing with that than i used to. I guess maybe I thought before I got sick, that talking about "if something happened to me" then it wouldn't. that couldn't be farther from the reality. Something DID happen to me and now we have to do this will. I don't like it. Kaili doesn't like it, John doesn't like it. I can't stand to think of not being here to help Damon navigate his childhood. It should be me, his momma. In the mean time I will do all that I can, love him with all my heart, teach him all that I can think of. i often find myself giving Kaili and John pep talks about what I want for Damon, etc...
I will keep praying, keep reading, keep my faith. Heavenly Father has a plan bigger than all of us...and if it includes taking me home, then I pray for peace and healing for all my family and loved ones including friends, left here to deal with life. I pray that everyone will carry on, believing that I'm happy, and looking forward to the day when we are reunited! These things I pray for.