Me and My Family

Me and My Family

16 January, 2011

Miracles and Misgivings

It is truly a miracle...there is presently no evidence of any cancer in my body.
Amazing! Wonderful! A true answer to all the prayers offered up for me.

Such a mood lifter and so many reasons to get myself healthy and stay that way. And yet....

And yet,

I still have small misgivings deep down inside. Will I have recurrance, When? If so will we be able to fight it again like this last time? Will I be able to fight this long enough to raise my son? The Doctor says it will most likely recurr, but she can't really say 100%. She at least gives a little room for hope in miracles, I think she senses our faith and reliance on our Heavenly Father.

I do have these misgivings, however, I do not let them smother me and my days. I am slowly getting back to a routine at the gym, at home, and in my mind. I sometimes forget I have to keep fighting. I like that feeling. I want to enjoy life they way I used to before April 22, 2010.

I'm getting there. All my side effects are gone with the exception of the neuropothy in hands and feet. Food tastes the way it should, (seems like a miracle in itself), I don't feel cold all the time, my stomach isn't rolling due to the chemicals in my body. My muscles are not tired and sore like they used to be, and I don't need a nap every day anymore. Even without a nap I can stay up most nights past 9pm. So, many things are getting back to normal.

I'll take as much normal I can get!!!! Normal comes with miracles and misgivings...I'll take both (more miracles than misgivings), but hey! 
Thank you to ALL of who have prayed for me (us) and kept us in your thoughts/hearts all these months.
Keep it comin'
God Bless each of you forever!

1 comment:

  1. I'm so glad you are feeling back to normal- at least mostly! I think the worry and the thoughts of reoccurance are normal and the trick is not to let those overtake your life and sadly I'm the last person to be giving advice about that! Love you lady!!